1 Sex, Pies and Idiot Scrapes

An alcohol-free Springfield Saint Patrick's Day parade is interrupted by a brawl between the Nationalist Irish and the Unionist Northern Irish in which Homer participates. A group of hungry children steal Marge's picnic basket. She is saved by Patrick Farrelly, who gives the children a cabbage and returns the basket. Marge offers him a cupcake in gratitude, and Patrick immediately offers her a job at his bakery after eating it. Homer is taken to jail, because of his involvement in the riot. Due to his history of crime, Homer's bail is set incredibly high, and he is forced to get a bail bondsman named Lucky Jim to help him. Lucky Jim agrees to secure Homer's release from prison, as long as Homer does not skip his bail. Otherwise, he will have to deal with Wolf the Bounty Hunter, who quickly inspires Homer to become a bounty hunter himself. Homer's first mission involves pretending to sell condos on a street corner to criminals. Snake approaches Homer, who tries to take Snake down. Homer corners Snake in an alleyway, where Snake pulls out a pistol and fires a shot straight to Homer's head. Miraculously, Ned Flanders places a sheet of bulletproof glass in front of Homer, which deflects the shot. Ned attempts to convince Snake to come in quietly, unknowingly allowing Homer to sneak up behind Snake and capture him by asphyxiating him with a plastic bag. Homer convinces Ned to join him as a bounty hunting duo.

At the bakery, Marge realizes that Patrick employed her at an erotic bakery after seeing Patty and Selma pick out a suggestively-shaped cake. Marge tries to quit, but Patrick says that there is nothing wrong with what he is doing, and that many of her friends have bought cakes from the store. Patrick informs Marge that she has a gift, and Marge agrees to stay. Meanwhile, Homer and Ned are successfully pursuing several bail-jumpers. Homer, now richer, spoils his family with gifts. Marge is equally proud of her job. That evening, Homer and Ned conduct a stakeout, hoping to take in Fat Tony. When he emerges next morning, Homer and Ned chase him around Springfield and eventually capture him by crashing their car into a subway car. Disgusted by Homer's lawless capture, Ned angrily quits. Ned tries to get out of the bounty-hunting business, but agrees to hunt for Homer after Lucky Jim informs Ned that Homer has skipped his bail, while being too distracted with his new job. At first, Ned still refuses, but after he sees the other "options" of Jim (a number of amoral and sociopathic Bounty Hunters) Ned fears for Homer's sake and decides to arrests Homer by himself.

When Homer arrives home to find Ned waiting for him, Homer declares that Ned will never take him alive. A long Parkour chase ensues, ending with the two on a beam suspended high over the ground. Homer wails that he loved Ned, but Ned counters that Homer mostly hated him. Homer scoffs that it was only because Ned holds onto his resentments. Homer jumps onto another beam, but Ned fails to land on it, gripping onto the edge of the beam. He begs Homer for help, which causes Homer to flash back to all the good times he and Ned had together; Homer finally helps Ned, but ends up tumbling over the edge of the beam himself. Shrieking, he and Ned end up landing in a pool of wet cement – which unfortunately sets before they can get out. Chief Wiggum arrives to put Homer away, but in jail, Homer has been sentenced to a short stay. On the last night of his sentence, he receives a cake from Marge to "help get him through his sentence". He opens it to find a regular pink and white frosted sheet cake that simply says "to the love of my life". At the same time, Sideshow Bob escapes from the Springfield Penitentiary.

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